Atiya Bhutta

10/25/2019

Hello to Joy! Where Does Joy Come From?

Finding small moments of joy in everyday life is one of the keys to becoming a happier, more relaxed person.

Where does joy come from? Some people find that their greatest happiness comes from sharing time with their friends or family. Others get a buzz from being creative or working toward a longed-for goal. However you like to spend your time, you are probably at your best when you are focusing on what you are doing right now - being in the moment makes us feel good! Quick fixes - like a wild night out or some new clothes - are great, but short-term highs like these need to be backed up with bigger resources of satisfaction. So if you wish you could feel more joyful, perhaps it's time to dig a little deeper...

The fact is: joy comes from within yourself. Your mood doesn't have to depend on what you have, or how successful you are in love, work, or any other aspect of life. It's more about appreciating the little things and making the most of every single day.

Some people say that happiness is a temporary feeling, while joy is a more stable, permanent emotion - not so much a transient feeling as an attitude of mind. If you can cultivate a joyful attitude, you will find that it transforms your experience of life. Of course you will still have ups and downs, because emotions and moods tend to come and go. But strengthening your emotional well-being will allow you to weather the storms and enjoy the sunshine even more.

Remember one thing most of all...

YOU HAVE THE POWER TO BRING MORE JOY INTO YOUR LIFE!

You may ask; if it's that easy, why are we all not more joyful? Part of the answer lies in our inbuilt tendency to put up barriers against joy. These blocks can come from patterns of behaviour that are based on past experiences, on a constructed view of ourselves and of life. Learning to recognise and overcome those blocks is a part of the journey toward true satisfaction and contentment.

Whatever stage of life you are in, whether things are going great or not, there's room for deeper, longer-lasting joy. Start to track your emotions so you get to know yourself better and reflect on why you feel the way you do.

Keeping a mood journal is recommended by therapists and psychologists because it:

Creates a visual guide to your moods, so you can notice and appreciate the good times as well as spot niggling issues before they get out of hand.

Provides a fantastic tool to build self-awareness, which helps you to develop greater self-confidence.

Reveals links between what you do and how you feel - encouraging you to plan your time for maximum benefit.

Encourages perspective - recording your emotions helps create a little distance between what is going on in your head and how you react to it, putting you in control.

Feels good! Tracking your moods can be a healing act in itself, in the same way that talking through an issue helps.

10/24/2019

Say Thanks - Gratitude

by Atiya Bhutta, in blogs

Say Thanks - Gratitude

Gratitude is good for your health and mental well-being. When you focus on what you don't have, this makes you feel dissatisfied. When you are grateful, you naturally feel more content with the way things are. Simply noticing the good things in your life can help you to feel uplifted - and the more you practise this the easier it becomes. Look for ways to say thank you everyday. Here are some practical ways you can increase your gratitude.

Three thoughts

Every night, write down three small things you are grateful for - such as sunny weather or a chat with a friend. Let yourself experience the happy feeling that is gratitude.

Gratitude jar

Choose a nice big jar and whenever you feel grateful for something write it on a small piece of paper and put it in the jar. Then, when you need a boost, pick a piece of paper out of the jar, read it, remember the joy of that moment.

Embrace challenges

Be thankful for the difficulties in your life. Although they may be hard in the moment, challenges offer an opportunity to become more self-aware and as a result choose ways of being that create more space for joy.

Notice what you have

When you feel unhappy or dissatisfied, try listing all the positive things in your life. Try counting five things on the fingers of one hand right now.

Be in nature

Experiencing nature helps us feel calmer. Wherever you are, appreciate its beauty; a flower, a tree, or the sky. Whenever you get a chance, take a walk in the countryside, enjoying every step.

Giving thanks

You may be saying "thank you" many times a day without paying attention. Notice when you thank someone next time. Take the time to look at the person and let yourself feel your appreciation.

Rewire your brain

You can change the habit of complaining. Whenever you catch yourself wishing to moan about something trivial, stop and think of something good in that situation or the person involved.

10/24/2019

Make Changes, Even Though You Have No Time

by Atiya Bhutta, in blogs

Make Changes, Even Though You Have No Time

One of the biggest challenges we face is lack of time. We all know that it takes commitment to change our habits, but we also want results, fast! So, how can you make changes that will help you feel more joyful sooner? Here are some ways to make use of any spare time you have to transform your life. Tiny changes can make a big difference to how you feel.

Start small

Set yourself a simple goal, something that you can easily manage, such as taking a deep breath when you first wake up for three days. Achieving a small change will boost your confidence and encourage you to keep going.

Shift your attitude

Feeling happier is often a matter of changing the way you think and feel rather than your circumstances. Experiment with adopting a joyful approach to doing one thing you normally find boring - such as singing along to music while you load the dishwasher or do the ironing.

Re-evaluate

Assess your time management. Are you using your time wisely? Can you reduce time spent on less valuable activities to free up space for practising joyfulness? If you don't want to completely forgo something, then try alternating days and times to do different things.

Message yourself

It's easy to get caught up in the busyness of daily life, so if there is a new habit you want to adopt, leave yourself reminders everywhere; on your phone, in your wallet, and on sticky notes around your home.

Get inspired

Create a chart, collage, or drawing of your life and add all the new things you would like to be a part of it. Hang it on your wall, so you see it everyday.

Find a window

Everyone has some idle time in a day, whether it is waiting for a doctor's appointment or sitting on a train. Don't fill this time, but use it to be more joyful; take deep breath, smile, or focus on being in the moment.

Put it in writing

Write down the changes you want to implement. Make a note in your weekly planner or monthly review, or simply in a diary. Expressing your wishes helps focus your mind and strengthen your motivation.

10/24/2019

Let go of Worries - Anxiety

by Atiya Bhutta, in blogs

Let Go Of Worries - Anxiety

A certain amount of worrying is normal. Anxiety is a survival mechanism that keeps you safe - if you had no fear, you might cross the road without looking, for example. Worrying can also tell you when something is not right and you need to get out of a situation. However, anxiety can get out of hand and take up precious time and energy. Decluttering your mind of worries leaves you free to experience more joy. Put those negative thoughts in their place!

Relax your body

Worrying makes your body tense, but relaxing the body can actually help relieve worrying. Yoga and Pilates can be great ways to unwind.

Face it

Often worries are about things that are unlikely to happen. Challenge yourself by asking; "What's the worst that can happen?" It's likely the worst is not as bad as you fear.

Make a list

If worry stops you from sleeping, make a list of your concerns before you go to bed. Once your worries are down on paper, your mind knows you won't forget them so can let go of them.

Make a worry date

Have a specific time for worrying - say, 7pm for 10 minutes. When worries surface at other times, remind yourself you can worry later!

Practice forgiveness

Holding a grudge creates burdens that you carry around with you, and can exacerbate worry. Let yourself forgive others from your heart and forgive yourself too if you feel you have wronged anyone.

You're safe now

Worry is something usually about something that has happened in the past, which you cannot change, or in the future, which we cannot predict. Remind yourself that you are safe right now - tell yourself, "I'm okay," or "I'm safe."

Get perspective

Imagine yourself 10, 20, or 30 years from now. How important will your current worries be then? Chances are that they won't matter much.

So put your worries behind you...

10/24/2019

Boost Your Confidence - Stand Tall & Believe In Yourself

by Atiya Bhutta, in blogs

Boost Your Confidence - Stand Tall & Believe In Yourself

If you feel hesitant about trying new things, this may be because you don't value yourself highly enough to believe you can succeed. Lack of confidence can hold you back from achieving your dreams, and is a way of self-sabotaging your happiness. Working on your self-confidence helps you to feel free to be who you are without judging yourself. Stand tall and believe in yourself.

Put yourself first

Often you know exactly what you need to do in order to feel better. Yet somehow you put it off, placing your needs last on your to-do list. Remind yourself that your are important as everyone else and prioritise feeling good.

Block false beliefs

If you notice yourself voicing a negative belief such as "I can never get anything right" or "I'm such a loser," stop! Remind yourself that you don't have to believe negative thoughts.

Be self-kind

Have you noticed how you speak to yourself internally? Do you berate yourself when you make a mistake or blame yourself for everything that goes wrong? Speak as kindly to yourself as you would to others.

Know yourself

Sometimes a lack of confidence can stem from a lack of self-knowledge. Being present in life helps to build your awareness, so you get to know yourself better. Be curious about what makes you tick.

Be brave

When you are reluctant to do something that you know is good for you, take a leap and do it anyway. Facing your fears help you to develop greater confidence. If you avoid what you are afraid of, you won't ever find out what is possible.

Build resilience

A short video discussing how to take care of yourself and why it is important to prioritise your well-being.

10/21/2019

Kick the Judgement, How to accept and let go

by Atiya Bhutta, in blogs

Kick the Judgement

Why do some people move on from difficulties more easily than others? Acceptance is one of the keys. The reason we don’t accept something is because we make a judgement about it, for example, “this bad thing happened to me and now my life is ruined”. Acceptance means letting go of judgement and facing the reality of a situation, whatever that might be. When you kick the judgement, you experience more peace and joy everyday. Accept each moment as it comes, and embrace who you are.

Acknowledge feelings

Try not to judge your feelings as good or bad - this can create extra stress because it leads to the thought “I shouldn’t be feeling this way.” Try giving your feelings a label - anger, disappointment, joy, calmness - and allowing them to be.

Know the difference

Accepting a situation doesn’t mean you agree with it or like it. Remind yourself that you can disagree or dislike a situation, and still accept the way things are.

Allow mistakes

Fear of making mistakes can hold you back. But everyone makes mistakes! The trick is to see them as a learning opportunity. Just as a toddler learning how to walk falls down and gets up time and time again, mistakes can build success.

Self-accept

Let go of negative self-judgements about your appearance, performance, or any other aspect of yourself. Ignore false beliefs about not being good enough, be honest with yourself, and accept all that you are.

Everything changes

When something is particularly hard to accept remind yourself that just as nature changes with the seasons, everything moves, nothing is static. Whatever situation you are facing or difficult feelings your are experiencing, these things will change too.

Take compliments

It’s as important to accept the good things in life as the bad. How well do you take a compliment? Do you make excuses, or minimise it? Try to accept compliments with grace.

And lastly...

Check expectations

We live in a time when many things are possible and so we can develop high expectations about our lives. This can lead to disappointment when things don’t work out. Keeping expectations in check helps you to be confident.

10/21/2019

Balance your moods, Make small changes to your lifestyle and prioritise self-care

by Atiya Bhutta, in blogs

Balance Your Moods

No one feels calm and balanced in every moment, but if you often find yourself worrying or feeling low, this can stop you from enjoying life or doing the things that matter to you. Making small changes to your lifestyle and prioritising good self-care helps to regulate your emotions so you experience more even moods, rather than continual peaks and troughs. Your body and mind depend on each other - treat them both with love. Make these seven things an important part of your week...

Good sleep

Get enough sleep (eight hours a night is a good average), and have regular waking and sleeping times. Switch off electronic devices 1-2 hours before you go to bed - their light tricks your brain into thinking it is still daytime and can stop you dropping off.

Regular exercise

Exercise is proven to regulate moods, so incorporate it into each day. Giving your body a workout makes you feel more present and energised, and stops you overthinking.

Getting outside

Nature is a mood-balancer. Going for even a short walk enhances good feelings and takes the intensity out of bad ones. If you can’t get out into the countryside, go to your local park and enjoy looking at the sky and trees.

Listening to music

Put on your favourite feel-good track when you need a boost. Allow yourself to move your body in tune with the music. Experiment with different types of music, including classical.

Eat yourself happy

Sit down to eat rather than grabbing something on the run. Take a few moments to pause before you start, and be thankful for your food - this slows down your eating and makes it more pleasurable.

Discover meditation

Meditation is a wonderful way to help calm your minds there are lots of different types to explore. Try closing your eyes and focusing on your breathing - silently count the breaths from one to ten (start again whenever you lose count).

And lastly...

Talk it out

If you are feeling low, speak to someone you trust - talking can help shift negative feelings so long as you don’t feel judged. Ask the person to listen without offering solutions (unless you want advice, of course).

10/20/2019

Beat the Blocks, How to find ways to reconnect with your joy

by Atiya Bhutta, in blogs

Beat the Blocks

Everyone has the natural ability to feel joyful but we can also stop ourselves from experiencing happiness, often without realising it. Find ways to reconnect with the joy within and learn to notice the ways that you block your own happiness. Becoming more aware is the first step towards overcoming the barriers. We all have negative thoughts about ourselves. Next time you find yourself being self-critical, ask; Is this really true? Don’t believe all your mind tells you. A change in attitude is often all you need to feel happier!

Overcome challenges

When you face a difficulty, ask yourself, what qualities do I need to get through it? If you could see the situation as teaching you something, what would the lesson be?

Think outside the box

If you are limited by your circumstances, such as health issues, think your way round this. Instead of focusing on what’s not possible, think of what is!

Be you

Social media creates the false illusion that if only you were different, you would feel happy. Take regular breaks from social media, and appreciate who you are.

Set healthy limits

We all need to set limits. If you are a people pleaser, start saying “no”. But if “no” is your automatic response, consider becoming more accommodating.

And lastly...

Close the gap

If you have a long-term goal that seems unachievable at the moment, think of a single step that can take you closer to that goal. Then do it!

10/20/2019

Live in the moment, Stop thinking about yesterday or tomorrow, and start living today

by Atiya Bhutta, in blogs

Live in the Moment

Being present is the best way to bring more joy into your life. Most of us spend a lot of time remembering or regretting the past in the one hand, and planning or worrying about the future on the other. We are very rarely in the present moment and this means that we miss out in the full quality of our experiences and the many small joys that each day brings. Stop thinking about yesterday or tomorrow, and start living today.

Act from the heart

What is good for others may not be right for you. If you are facing a dilemma, focus on your heart area and notice if there are feelings of discomfort or relaxation here. What you feel isn’t he heart is usually a good guide to the best decision.

Walk your walk

When you walk, be present. Feel your body as you are walking. Feel your legs moving, so your mind is not busy thinking of other things. Do the same with any activity, for example, eating, talking, listening.

Ground yourself

Connecting to what you can feel in your body helps you to feel more grounded. Notice the soles of your feet where they make contact with the floor, or the pressure on your thighs and buttocks if you’re sitting in a chair. And breathe!

Be alert

Set and alert on your phone to sound every hour and use it to remind yourself to check if you are in the now or lost in thought. Take that moment to reconnect with the present moment.

Let go of the past

If your thoughts are stuck in the past, simply notice this. Don’t fight it or criticise yourself. Shift your attention back into the present moment by looking around and noticing what you can see right now.

Go with the flow

We don’t know what is around the corner. Yet we often spend a lot of time thinking about what might be. We may be over controlling our lives in order to avoid feeling the fear of the unknown. Trust that you can handle what comes your way.

Less is more

Be aware of the tendency to fill every minute of the day. Do you really need to check your emails or text messages again? Whenever you are waiting for someone or something, allow the time to pass and don’t fill it with needless busy-ness.

10/20/2019

Stress Busters, How to tackle stress & keep stress levels low

by Atiya Bhutta, in blogs

Stress Busters

Everyone gets stressed sometimes. Short bursts of stress are not harmful, but prolonged periods of tension can affect your health and happiness. Life has become increasingly 24/7 and there are many pressures on all of us. So it’s important to find ways to keep your stress levels to a minimum. Stress drains the joy out of life. Find ways to keep it under control. Here are some simple ways to de-stress and improve your performance and well being.

Breathe

When you get stressed, your breathing becomes shallow. Taking a few long deep breaths is a quick and powerful way to calm down. Let your out-breath last longer than your in-breath. This slows down your heart rate.

Move your body

Being physically active helps to relieve physical and mental tension. Run, dance, swim, walk or whatever gets you moving - and enjoy it. Focus on what you feel in your body while you are moving.

One thing at a time

If you feel overwhelmed, don’t keep going, thinking that you will feel better once everything is done. Stop and make a list. Then focus on one task at a time, starting with the thing that is most important right now.

Have fun

When did you last do something for the fun of it? Make time to do something you really love - you’ll get a welcome boost of energy and smiling helps to release stress.

Avoid the stress trap

When you are worrying, try to allow yourself to be aware of this without following the trail of your thoughts. Bring your attention to your heart area and feel calmness radiate from here.

Get pampered

This is one of my favourites. Have a massage or beauty treatment to help release tension. Stress can be felt and held in the body, and physically relaxing helps to release it. Making time to care for yourself feels good!

And lastly...

Time out

Pause and gather your thoughts regularly during the day. Nothing is ever so urgent that you cannot take a few moments to relax. I find writing things down very therapeutic and definitely helps you release those thoughts out of your system.

10/20/2019

Love Your Life, What to do on a daily basis to make yourself feel good

by Atiya Bhutta, in blogs

Love Your Life

Sometimes we are so busy simply surviving that we do not actually appreciate our life. Our days can start to feel like a chore and a trudge from one task to the next. But life is a gift and there are so many wonderful things to enjoy. Reconnect with the things you love most and try some new experiences that will help you embrace the joy. Make time everyday to do something that makes you feel good.

Get sociable

Our brains are wired for social interaction, but some people help you feel energised and others leave you drained. Think about whose company you enjoy most and prioritise spending time with them.

Rekindle your passion

Is there an activity or hobby that used to make your heart sing? If you have stopped doing it, find a way of bringing it back into your life. Even if your mind makes excuses, take the first step today.

Be Kind

Practising kindness not only helps others, it makes you feel good too. Do an act of

kindness today, consciously and with a smile. You can also make a list of small

kindnesses that you can do regularly.

Try something new

It’s energising to get out of your comfort zone, so make the most of opportunities to try different activities. You may

find you enjoy something you had never considered before.

Seize the moment

Studies show that you need to use the momentum created when you feel the

urge to do something - for example, getting out of bed. If you wait more than

20-30 seconds, the momentum is gone and it’s harder to act.

Focus on needs

When you don’t get what you want, you may feel frustrated. You need to ask

yourself, if what you are feeling will benefit you and help you survive. In most

cases it won’t! It’s freeing to realise the difference between wants and needs.

And lastly...

Smile more

The act of smiling releases hormones that make you feel joyful. When you smile,

let yourself experience the gentle feelings of calmness and joy in your chest area.

10/20/2019

Things to know before visiting Dubai, An overview of my visit to Dubai

by Atiya Bhutta, in travels

Things to know before visiting Dubai

An overview of my visit to Dubai in 2018

A place where you will find luxury and lots of things to do. I have visited three times and have found every visit to be pleasant.

Often people seem to think that Dubai is an expensive place, for sure things are a lot more pricey however there are always ways to make cut backs and have just as much equal fun.

Whether you are travelling alone or with others, Dubai is a safe place to visit. Crime rates are low due to their strict laws. Dubai caters for different people. I have found the people in Dubai to be friendly, helpful and respectable.

Cost/Spending Money

You will need £500 - £600 spending money approximately depending on what you plan to do. I would advise to book any excursions or tours in advance. This will save you a lot of money, you may be able to reduce your spending costs when you get there. If you run out of cash, Dubai allows the use of card transactions at most places, you can alternatively withdraw more money from an ATM however this will of course charge you a fee. Booking with some hotels allow you to have some concessions and discounts at the famous tourist attractions.

Food/Places to eat

You will find a range of different cuisines at every corner. The cheaper side where you will find a large population of south Asian migrants are mainly in the Bur Dubai district. This area is full of hustle and bustle and the night life is very lively. The Burj Khalifa adjacent to Dubai Mall is also an area full of liveliness, as you will be able to view the light show and dancing fountains. Restaurants dotted around are quite expensive however inside the Dubai mall is a good place for a variety of cheap and cheerful food. Malls and public areas are usually air-conditioned therefore you can be rest-assured that you will be kept cool.

A good place to visit is Juice World where you will be able to find fresh juice, smoothies and ice-cream, fruit salads, faloodas and sandwiches. Juice World is an interesting place to visit as it boasts fruit bouquets, which will definitely be a snap for the gram!

You would think that camel meat would be easily available in Dubai, however this is rare! There is only one restaurant which sells camel meat in the whole of Dubai. Look out for The Local House Restaurant near Al Fahidi Metro and not far from Dubai Creek. Their biryani is luscious and a plate can be enough to share between two adults.

Travel/Getting around

The best and cheapest way to travel is the Metro and bus as it allows you to explore the city better. You can easily get a Metro card at any Metro station counter, where you can top-up your fares. The card is non-refundable and when purchased the cost will be added to the prepay top-up. This card can also be used on buses. It is very much a touch in/out system similar to the Oyster card in London, England. A Metro map is easily available at any Metro station. The Metro trains have a strict rule of no eating or drinking, therefore be mindful unless you want to pay a fine! The Metro also has a women's only section. Metro trains are frequent and fast, you will not be disappointed.

Taxi rides can be expensive therefore I would recommend to only use it in an emergency or really long distances. Look out for the beige/brown taxis as they have a meter. The roads in Dubai are long and wide and not pedestrian friendly, therefore a lot of walking is required. I would advise to plan your trips in advance to map out where you need to go and how to get there.

Shopping/Bazaars

If you are interested in shopping, you may want to visit the souks. The Gold Souk is a place where you can find a lot of jewellery and goldsmiths, it can be extremely busy with an extremely large variety of gold so think about what it is you are looking for. There are many other Souks to visit; Perfume Souk and Spice Souk, all of which are in close proximity of each other. The perfume Souk is almost like a small village with lots of shops selling perfume and other items. It was not what I expected to find.

Meena Bazaar is in walking distance from Al-Fahidi Metro station and is very similar to visiting a bazaar in South Asia. Here you will find Indian and Pakistani clothes and foods. You will also come across a lot of stalls where you can buy little souvenirs. Be sure to haggle for a bargain here. There is a traditional touch and the atmosphere is always buzzing!

Must-see

Global Village is a favourite and a must-see place to visit. There is a lot going on, with street food, live entertainment, a touch of culture from each country, very family friendly with entertainment for children. On a Friday evening there is always a concert taking place so look out for this on their website. There is an amusement park for all ages and a fireworks display on certain days of the week. Plenty to see and do!

Beaches

Dubai does not have many natural landmarks to view, there are the beaches to visit but not much nature. Everything is grand and magnificent and a lot of it is man-made. The popular beaches to visit are; Sunset beach, near Jumeirah Beach Hotel. You will be able to view the famous Burj al Arab landmark in the background, making it a very scenic place to be. You can also visit the Black Palace Beach and the Umm Suqeim, where you will be able to view the Burj al Arab in the background. Dubai's beaches are sandy with clear waters and long stretches. Jumeirah Public beach is a popular spot to visit. Luckily ladies can also enjoy a women's only beach day exclusively for women where no male aged above four years is allowed. This has been designated for women, both tourists and residents to accommodate for religious and cultural reasons. You will find womens-only days at Al Mamzar Beach Park on Sundays and Tuesdays, and Monday and Wednesday at Jumeirah Beach Park.

Clothing/What to wear

As Dubai is very multicultural, you will find people dress as they please, liberally. There are no strict rules except when you are visiting a mosque or religious site. Due to the heat it would be best to cover up wearing loose light clothing, and keeping yourself protected from the sun. A scarf would be handy or a cover up for the evening. This depends on the time of year that you visit. There is generally a modest dressing etiquette and you will also find South Asians wearing their cultural clothing. I have found wearing maxi dresses to be the best choice to wear in the heat as they tend to be loose, modest and you can find nice prints. Kaftans are also a very popular choice in Dubai.

What to pack?

I have found that hotels in Dubai always supply generously for any essentials, therefore you need not to worry about such toiletries. You will of course need to pack your essentials. Be sure to pack a pair of sunglasses, sunblock, sunhat and comfortable walking shoes. Public toilets are always clean with cleaning facilities therefore you do not need to worry about walking around with a hand sanitiser or extra toilet paper! If you are planning to visit the beach, do not forget your bathing suit/shorts. Due to the heat you may want to pack a day time and evening outfit, of course depending on what you plan to do.

Everyone’s experience will always be different, however there is only so many times you can visit and it can become a bit repetitive when you have seen the main tourist attractions.

I would recommend at least one visit to Dubai, but not a go-to destination for travellers looking to explore.